The Pope - Pro-Life - Birth Control

 

Copyright © 1947-2016

Are You Pro Life or Pro Choice?

This upsets me when people ask this question as if they are only concerned about the "from conception to birth." This question has to be broken up into three parts, past, present and future. For all you swinging dicks out there that thinks Mother's Day is nine months after father night and are worried about the health of a Mothers Vagina. Go get a vasectomy!

Past

Going back to the point in my life that marriage and settling down first crossed my mind. I had three life questions.

1. What is the best time to have children?
2. Which is worse, to lose a child or your wife?
3. What is the smartest race or nationality?

I'll discuss the other two later. The answer to number one perplexed me for a long time. If my name were Jimmie, Jerry, Robert, or Pat I would say God spoke to me, and by the way I talk to God all the time, I know he's listening, he just doesn't answer. Anyway I woke up in the middle of the night and had the answer. Do you know when the best time to have children is? When you want them! There is another question that upsets me! "Birth Control" Why do you force women to bring unwanted children into a world where they will more than likely die before their first birthday. Back in the 70s a friend I was working construction with at an oil refinery in Corpus Christi Texas told me a little about himself. He was from Mexico, the youngest child of 17 that lived, a good Catholic, but there was no way in Hell he and his wife is going through the torture his parents did of having 17 children. He did have a sense of humor, when I first met him; he told me his name was Manual, Manual Labor. I didn't realize he was pulling my leg for two or three days.

Present

I'm Pro-Life. But I defer to what my mother said "It is between Me and God. Those SOB's better keep their noise out of my Business." This embarrassed me because I knew she was talking about her private parts.

Future

Read a book to your kids!

I have a story or a joke that I like to tell that is one of my oldest and I never thought about its origin until I started writing this piece. Tracing it back to my grandfather when I was about five I heard him say's something to the effect of those no-good kids need a job and a mortgage. Over the years I've expanded this idea. First it was Polish no-good kids. In Texas it was Mexican no-good kids and today I use the "Young Teenagers."

When us older people are talking about young teenagers of today, I like to interject this story. "Do you know how to get even with them?" This is the fun part; everybody looks at me with a weird look on their face. "How and Why?"

1. Make sure they're healthy.
2. Provide them with a good education.
3. Find them a good job.
4. Before you know it they will get married, have kids, and a mortgage.
5. Now they are just like us, have to pay Taxes and less likely to pick up a gun! "This is not about charity, it's about justice... The war against terror is bound up in the war against poverty" - Colin Powell.

If you feel offended, all I can tell you is what my friend Jeffrey told me.


While attending UW Madison Wisconsin, I was a bartender and Jeffrey was a gay waiter friend at the Edgewater Hotel. He major in Social Science and was obsessed with overpopulation. To get him going, I would tell him I was a good Christian that was going to have 15 or 20 children. After a while all he would do is smile at me and say. "They are looking for people like you at the Soylent Green Factory!"

 

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